Pain from the Past

I remember holding my mom captive for her past mistakes. I was truly the most miserable person on earth. I nursed a hatred until the moment when I saw that this was going bad in a fast hurry. I was a young woman of 28 and all the hatred and bitterness in my heart began to unfold before my eyes. God had opened the book of my heart for me to see. I was overwhelmed with a sense of guilt compounded with a sense of wanting justice. But I saw my role. It was simple. Either I move on in life whole and complete and getting healed from my past or I hold on to her wrongs and stay captive to bitterness and hatred all my days. You know what I chose because I woud not be sitting here writing this. Today my Mom is still human and we are not the same or see things the same or practice our faith the same but there is a love and respect that is truly a gift. I am so glad I got to see this side of it without life taking away from me all those days in the name of anothers weakness. Be encouraged..take courage to forgive those that have hurt you...parents, ex spouses, children, friends, you will never regret it as long as you live.

The Dream

Its like a dream. Who I am comes to the surface like a dream. The shuffle of every day life, the emotions and relationships that form my daily existence, the doings, and beings the downs and ups, come and go, leaving the dreams behind like an evaporating morning fog. But don't be fooled. They remain hidden deep within the wells of the  soul and it is up to me to draw them out, it is my part to take out my colored pencils and sketch them where they  can be seen upon the canvas of my awake consciousness. The seed of those dreams was planted when I was created wonderfully in my mother's womb. It is up to me to water and nourish that seed and bring forth a fruit, if I so choose. The dreams, they try to surface, flashing by like the roadrunner in the cartoons, but not so elusive that I can't capture them if I want. They are more part of me than I suspect, they may determine all of eternity if I so choose. Its time, if ever there was a now moment, this is it. Its time to open up the package and get serious about growing that fruit. Its time to not be afraid, its time to gather the strength and take a risk, its time to find out whats inside and lose a few rounds to win the final contest. Its just time.